12th year

I'm a bit irritated because the blog as an online publishing genre had been on the wane for years, but I kept doing it out of bad habit. It's actually a fucking inefficient, time-consuming activity to blog. A lot of work for nothing. Fucking social networking sites aren't much more efficient. But say a "factory worker", slaving away on a conveyor belt, that her work is shit, and she're right too. Life is an evil video game, the graphics are good but the rules are unknown and there is no save, you die if you make a wrong move. I'm frustrated, and it hits me in the head. It makes it impossible for me to find joy in blogging. One golden rule: that gives no pleasure is don't do it. No one is forcing me to do it, just my own silly habit. I am a persistent idiot.And of course my persistence makes me a good professional. There is good in every bad thing. I'm nagging. I know it well. I am running away from a much bigger problem.

Week 41 was another busy week. On Saturday I went to the capital for a programme I had already been to once four years earlier. I was struck by the noticeable difference between the past and the present. The heart of the country is more tired and grey. No, it wasn't my mood that fooled me. As always, I was enthusiastic, because I love to explore, to experience. It really gets me going. So I was spinning in my 110% way. And I was stunned to see that the capital was fading.  What the hell? I'm in the heart of the country! Where is the power, the life?!* I committed to memory what I had seen and moved on. There was a mushroom exhibition in the Hungarian Museum of Natural History, which also invited me to the capital four years ago.

At the same time there was also a mushroom exhibition in the Soroksár Botanical Garden. Unfortunately, I could not fit the two events into one day. What I do regret, though, is that I didn't go to the National Museum, because I could have seen a very good photography exhibition. I am interested in photography as an art of capturing the moment, another attempt to create the illusion of immortality. And very effective! Because humans are visual beings, our eyes are our best sense. It is true that a picture is worth a hundred words. As writing was originally my first form of self-expression, I am a little bitter about this. But I have a flair for photography, so I smile from ear to ear. I hit the jackpot, I have multiple talents. In fact, there is a lot of room for manoeuvre, I can move anywhere.

I rarely go to museums, but they are important repositories of treasures, like giant chests in which we put relics of the past. In fact, a lot of information is thrown at us. My mind is very meticulous and eventually gets tired of processing so much data. Despite the exhaustion, it's still very enlightening to go to a museum and then find out what you've seen in reality. The past is all around us and shows us our future. For example, I love rocks and minerals. Marine limestones are particularly educational because of the wide variety of animal remains. When you walk in limestone mountains, remember that you are walking on what was once the seabed. The Bakony is famous for the Iharoskút dinosaur site. The museum contains two famous dinosaur skeletons. It's strange to think how ancient life on Earth is, and that humans are just one of millions of species, and that one day our entire era will be a thin sliver of a layer and nothing more.

My blog is 12 years old, but what is 12 years compared to millions of years? I couldn't even call it a moment. True, only one living creature counts time, man, and yet he does not take it seriously, nor does he think about the consequences of his actions. Yesterday, I photographed the old oaks in the castle park in Szabadkígyós. I love oak trees. The oldest living creatures of Békés county. They are beautiful and dying. Each of them tells the story of the last hundred or two hundred years of the county, how we have changed the landscape to our liking. Oaks are dying, and the destruction of nature is the extinction of our species. For twelve years I have been trying to raise awareness of the importance of nature. I have achieved nothing, because a beautiful picture or written word is ineffective against basic instincts. Anyway. What comes will be completely natural.

*Importantly, in my country, state power has been seized by a corrupt "terrorist group", which is deliberately eliminating any internal resistance through a well-constructed strategy to control the internal budget. It is simply using the power of the state to take money away from resistant cities. It is deliberately destroying parts of the country because the "terror group" has only its own well-being as its main and vague objective, which does not coincide with the objectives of the country and its people.